Hogs lineman finds way to block out emptiness

WALLY HALL
ARKANSAS DEMOCRAT-GAZETTE

LAS VEGAS -- It was an emptiness. Almost a void.
Each morning when Kenny Sandlin awoke, he felt something wasn't right in his life.
It was just after the Cotton Bowl victory last January, and there was no way he was supposed to be feeling like that.
At night, in the clubs, he was treated royally. Free drinks accumulated on his table. People wanted to toast him and teammates for helping the Hogs beat Texas.
"My first thought was maybe I wasn't partying hard enough," he said, "that I should have stayed out later or did this or that.
"But the more I tried to make that work, the worse it got."
Sandlin tore open four packets of sugar and dumped them in a cup of coffee, which has become the beverage of choice for him.
"I thought filling that hole in my heart with partying was the only way to go," he said, shaking his head and then laughing. "It didn't take long for me to realize that just wasn't getting it.'
If there is one word to describe Sandlin, it is "doer".
On the field or off, he doesn't let problems simmer until they flare into a fire.
In the first game this season, he turned and yelled at Cedric Cobbs, "We're giving you the hole, get up here and get through it!"
Another time, he got in Gary Hobbs' face for giving up back-to-back sacks.
The person he is toughest on is himself.
Let him miss a block, and you can read the body language from the farthest seat.
Sandlin, who moved from starting center to starting right guard last season, has been a doer on the field for a long time.
He played on Van Buren High's Class AAAA state championship in 1996 and was named All-Arkansas and All-Decade by the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette.
With his grit, courage and size, being a football warrior has come easily for Sandlin.
Yet there he was, January about to end, and he should have still had a Cotton Bowl high going. Instead, he was unhappy and he wanted to find out why.
He started looking for ways to connect to the community, to do some good deeds, but even that didn't stop the ache.
One of the places he called to see if it could point him to a project was Arkansas Athletes Outreach.
During a conversation, Ron Harris invited Sandlin to a Thursday night Bible study.
Instead of a party, Sandlin went to the AAO meeting.
"It wasn't like a light went off that night and my life changed," Sandlin said. "But it was the beginning of a process."
The next Thursday he went to Bible study again, and the Thursday after that, and that's when he knew.
"Each of those Thursdays some question I had was answered," he said. "The third Thursday, though, it hit me hard.
"I was blessed with the talent and ability to get to play major-college football. I was taking for granted what tens of thousands of guys would do about anything to get to experience, and yet I wasn't appreciative.
"On some level, I always knew the talents came from God. What I knew that night was I had never thanked him."
After the Bible study, Sandlin, Harris and teammate La'Zerius White got on their knees and Sandlin prayed that he would honor God in his playing and in his life.
That was when the ache ended, but another hurt began.
Some of his teammates didn't exactly welcome the change in Sandlin. They thought he wasn't one of them anymore.
"I was called a hypocrite, a Bible pusher and worse," he said. "I wasn't preaching to any of those guys, though. I don't wear my belief like a badge of honor. I just started praying for them."
A few weeks later, at 3:30 in the morning, Sandlin experienced something of shock.
When he answered the knock on his door, there stood Brett Shockley, the mammoth-sized right tackle who has suffered through injuries his entire career.
"Brett had been one of the more outspoken critics of my change, but I felt like we were still friends," Sandlin said.
Shockley was too intoxicated to drive, so Sandlin pulled on his clothes and drove him to his own apartment.
All the way, Shockley kept asking Sandlin questions about his change. Serious questions, but Shockley was still searching.
A few weeks later, they were both invited to the SEC Experience, an event in Talladega, Ala., sponsored by the Fellowship of Christian Athletes.
It was there, surrounded by football-playing Christians, that Shockley reached out for the help he really wanted. He hasn't had a drink in seven months.
"I've never seen anyone happier that Shock," Sandlin said. "It has been an incredible transformation. Once he realized he wasn't expected to be perfect, that whatever he had done in the past didn't count anymore, he became a new person.
"I'll tell you this, too. The night he accepted God, I cried like a baby."
Suddenly, those Thursday night Bible studies became more fun and more intense. They all became warriors, and Brad Friess, founder of AAO, gave them a Warrior's Creed that they live by.
On Sandlin's birthday, White gave him a surprise present. A New International Version Bible, complete with Bible cover.
"All I had was a little FCA Bible," Sandlin said. "So it really meant a lot to me that Z would do that, and then when I opened it and read what he had written, I almost broke down.'
White, who grew up in a church-attending home, had become part of Sandlin's support system, and he wanted to do something special for his teammate on his birthday.
"I wanted to give Kenny something that would help him in his journey," White said. "I wrote in it, 'Every warrior needs his armor and weapons, this is yours.' "
The night Sandlin was baptized, coaches Houston Nutt and Mike Markuson were there. As was his Bible group. But so were Quinton Caver, Kenny Hamlin and De'Andre Berry.
It wasn't long after that Sandlin was having a conversation with Becky Bull, Scott's wife. The Bull family is very involved with AAO.
"I was talking to her about getting a dog," Sandlin said. "The real reason I wanted one is they are chick magnets and I wanted to meet some girls, girls that went to church. She told me I didn't need a dog to attract girls, that I should just ask them out.
"I asked her like who, what girls, and she said, 'How about Leigh Ann?'
"As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she couldn't believe she had said it, but she also knew that message hadn't come from her.
"To be honest, I never thought someone like Leigh Ann Bull would go out with me, that she was out of my league."
The Bulls' daughter, a freshman at the UA, said yes and they've been dating the past four months.
Of course, there was one more question that would have to be answered, and Sandlin was ready.
How would the change in his life affect his football playing?
"At the SEC Experience," Sandlin said, "one of the things they taught us -- and it really makes sense -- is that if we don't use the gifts and abilities God gives us to their fullest, which means playing our hardest on every down, we are cheating him."
On the field, Sandlin is still a raging bull at times, but off it he has become a new man.
These days, he looks forward to the weekly meetings with his fellow warriors for another reason. They are studying Robert Lewis' Quest For Authentic Manhood, which is being led by Louis Campbell.
"I wasn't a real bad guy, and I'm not ashamed of what I did, but I'm glad it is behind me, that I've been forgiven," Sandlin said. "I realize now just how blessed I've been in my life. I have great parents, the ability to play football and just so much else."
These days when Kenny Sandlin wakes up, there is no emptiness, only fullness of life.

This article was published on Tuesday, December 19, 2000

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